Tuesday, January 27, 2009

i'm such a frogggah!

Frog: The frog is an amphibian in the order Anura (meaning "tail-less", from Greek an-, without + oura, tail), formerly referred to as Salientia (Latin saltare, to jump).

Hot Plate: A hot plate is a small electric stove often used in food preparation, generally for small dishes in places where a full kitchen stove would not be convenient. 

Frog on a hot plate: Me

Why is it that I can never settle with what I am doing, or with what I have?
Since I was a kid I jumped from thing to thing wanting one right after the other. It's not necessarily a bad thing, I just wish I could settle sometimes. I'm not always up and down, there are some very stable qualities about me. I'm just trying to figure out the thing in me that makes me want to hop.  And the funny thing is, I don't even really like frogs, we just happen have similar personalities. 

Current Prospect Hot Plates:

-I want a dog
-I want to be a flight attendant
-I want to move to New York
-I want to eat healthier and lose weight
-I want to live on a farm 
-I want to live in Colorado
-I want to be a Film Major (most of the time)
-I want be pregnant (weird phase)
-I want to remember things better
-I want butterflies in my room (real ones)
-I want to live in a perfect community
-I want to feed the poor
-I want to adopt the abandoned 
-I want to live in Africa
-I want to read 4 books at a time
-I want to make feature films, and small documentaries
-I want to go to Europe this summer
-I want to transfer colleges
-I want to go to NY this summer
-I want to work at fresh n easy, be a nanny, and work at a restaurant 
-I want to be a teacher

-I want to not want things

I want to get out of this phase of being so worried about myself. It's hard. Being human is hard. The selfishness  bursts from my insides and wraps itself around me like a bubble. I feel trapped. Caught up in what the world tells me, and what I tell myself. But, what about what God tells me?

1 Hear my prayer, O LORD; 
       let my cry for help come to you.

 2 Do not hide your face from me 
       when I am in distress. 
       Turn your ear to me; 
       when I call, answer me quickly.

 3 For my days vanish like smoke; 
       my bones burn like glowing embers.

 4 My heart is blighted and withered like grass; 
       I forget to eat my food.

 5 Because of my loud groaning 
       I am reduced to skin and bones.

 6 I am like a desert owl, 
       like an owl among the ruins.

 7 I lie awake; I have become 
       like a bird alone on a roof.

 8 All day long my enemies taunt me; 
       those who rail against me use my name as a curse.

 9 For I eat ashes as my food 
       and mingle my drink with tears

 10 because of your great wrath, 
       for you have taken me up and thrown me aside.

 11 My days are like the evening shadow; 
       I wither away like grass.

 12 But you, O LORD, sit enthroned forever,

your renown endures through all generations. 

Psalm 102: 1-12

If you reign Lord, reign over me. Take my life and use it to glorify you, not by the things I want but by the things you want for me. 

1 comment:

Allie Garcia said...

love love loveeee this. love, a fellow hot-plated frog